“I come from a pretty screwed up past… I spent the majority of my life making the absolute worst decisions, and it amazes me that I am in the position that I am in today. 10 years ago I would have never dreamed that I would be able to freely write these kinds of things on a church website for all of our youth to read.”
What follows is the outline of a post i made on brickhouseministry.com
the completed post was what i would consider the best religious article i have ever written. sadly it was too much for the church and they removed the post before i could save it.
this is all that is left… you’ll get the gist of [...]
last night I left Bailey alone in the bath tub, and this time, instead of dumping water out of the tub, she dragged by laundry basket into the water. I walked in there and clolthes were soaking wet and a half empty basket floating in the tub.
your stomach has a muscle that connects it to your small intestine, and that muscle has become narrow… so the doctor has to go in and split the muscles.
One good thing about having this time off is that i have finally been able to adjust to, and get used to being a dad.
i can finally say that i enjoy every minute of it…
the sounds of pain and anguish make you giddy… you truly are your fathers son.
Can you imagine how they felt when company came over, only to be greeted by the horrifying screams of young campers coming from my room. the sounds of chainsaws and breaking bones… blood squirting everywhere… i would imagine our guests felt a little uneasy…
by the time i got back there were people everywhere… everyone was set up and your mother was already pushing.
ten minutes later you were born.
There is no excerpt because this is a protected post.
fuck christmas.
download Burnstyle.net’s 2009 Christmas Mixtape!
kthxbye
Dear kid,
Today you projectile vomited 6oz of a milk-like substance at me. You missed me but managed to cover your entire face with regurgitated formula. What I’m trying to say is, you need to work on your aim.
This is a test of the JesusPod. This is only a test
