It’s been a few months since your mother and I split up. Since then you and I have moved to Florida, and bounced around between my mothers house… my fathers house… and johns house.
Life has been rough, yet rewarding. You have met new friends, and had experiences you wouldn’t have had if we had stayed in South Carolina. So far I haven’t regretted the move in the slightest.

So… Here is where I need to update you a little bit.

About a month ago i had to go back to South Carolina to solve a problem your mother was having with a friend of hers… During that time i learned that shortly after we left your mother started seeing the man she cheated on me with, again. they built a quasi-relationship, and then she broke up with him… for reasons im sure you will hear about later on… if you ask that is.
Your mother and i started talking… like humans… like adults… something we hadn’t done in a very long time. We laid our issues out on the table and solved a lot of the problems we had been having for the past few years.
Most of those problems had to do with us lying to each other. I had been lying about how i found out your mother cheated on me… and she had been lying about various aspects of their relationship.
We both came clean… We told each other the full truth, and in the process became friends again.
Knowing that most issues were resolved i felt comfortable coming back to Florida… so i packed and prepared to leave… then your great grandfather passed away.

I’m going to stop for a second and tell you some things about your great grandfather… these are things that i never want you to forget.
He loved you, possibly more than he loved anyone else. He once said that you were the only member of the family that hadnt lied to or stolen from him… you made him happy whenever you were around.
Two days before he died i spent a few hours talking with him, he asked about you… looked through some pictures, watched some videos, smiled, laughed… it was amazing. Before I left for the day he asked me to bring him some cheetos.

The last thing my grandfather said to me was “I could use some cheetos”

I spent the next night sitting at the nursing home with him… all night.
Every breath he took scared the shit out of me… i was afraid it would be his last…
Though…
He died the next night… while me, your mother, and her friend bradlee were eating taco bell and talking about bradlees boyfriend, and his commitment issues.

My mother brought you down with her for the funeral… you went to the viewing, and while everyone was crying, you were playing with dale earnhardt and a kyle petty hot wheels cars.
I will never forget the irony of watching you push a dale earnhardt car into the wall of a funeral home.

You met every member of your family that night. Everyone loved you.

I’m getting side tracked… back to my story.

After your great grandfather passed I was forced to stay in South Carolina for a few weeks, and during that time your mother and I decided to try and work out our problems and bring our family back together again.
Your mother decided to move to Florida so that we could all be together, but… the move is going to take her a few months…

So now I am here with you, and she is there with Bailey… and the separation is causing problems.

You see… I still have trust issues… Everyone i talk to says that is completely normal… and i think so too, the problem is my issues are causing me to act very paranoid.. and frankly like an ass.
For a long time during the arguments your mother and I had, I would feel so ashamed of myself… and the situation our family was in, that i would say things that were mean to your mom. I would remind her of what she did, and how it destroyed our family, and how it was all her fault. When in reality… none of that was true.

Relationship problems are never one sided… no one person is ever fully at fault. Our family split up… and that was as much my fault as it was hers… It took me a long time to realize that.
So now i am used to arguments… I expect every one of our conversations to lead to an argument, and i get very defensive. Hell… I start most of our arguments. I don’t mean to… I don’t mean to make your mother feel bad. I’m just sort of used to that. I’m used to her hurting me… then me hurting her back.

Let me tell you this… your mother has hurt enough.

Believe it or not but there was a time in our relationship where your mother and I had never argued… never raised our voices, never even really disagreed.
I want to get back to that point… but before i can do that I need to be able to see your mother the same way i used to. As a beautiful, perfect partner. A strong, kind, and loving mother.
To do that i have to let go of the past.
And as of today… that is what i will do.

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My grandmother died before she could meet you… and i regret that…. because she would have adored you. You would have been able to know her love. The warmth that only she could provide. If only she had not been a smoker.
At this point, everyone in your life is a smoker. your parents, grandparents, uncles and aunts.
Yes, even me.

I don’t want you to have to feel that you lost someone too soon.
So, as i am writing this i am smoking my last cigarette.

I am quitting because i love you, and want to be in your life for a very long time. I hope that i am not too late.

You do not have much time in this world, we all die suddenly. Embrace your ideas. Make them a part of you, but tread cautiously… because if you are not careful you may become them. They may turn you into a person that you never thought you could be.

I have often pondered the meaning of life. Why are we here? What is the purpose of our short, rather insignificant lives? After many late nights of introspective contemplation… this is the closest thing to an answer i can come up with. Live your life so that you may make at least one other person truly happy. If everyone were to live this way, there would be peace.

With Love,
your father.

I hope my son will have all the things that I missed out on.
I hope he will have stability, friends, love, and warmth.
I will do everything I can to provide him with those things… and give him a childhood that he will look back on with pride.

after reading the very first message, i thought she was a bot… and almost ignored her.
after reading the second message i still wasn’t quite sure.

3 cheers for curiosity!

i love you hun.

Melissa decided that we needed a new roof… so we had a red tin roof installed. Then she thought our door needed to match the roof… so we painted the front door red… then we painted the roof of the out building to match the roof of the house.

Now our yard is completely color coordinated… which is good… I guess.

After that was done and I finally had the chance to sit down and rest, Melissa calmly explained to me that I was no longer a bachelor, and that a desk supported by phone books and bibles with two computers, a TV, and 6 video game consoles stacked on top of it just wasn’t going to fly anymore.
So I went out and got enough stuff to build two desks, two bookcases, and an end table.
I fashioned myself a nice L shaped desk with a bookcase holding 9 video game consoles and a TV, three sets of drawers, and a glass stand for my laptop.
I wired the TV to a Nintendo, Super Nintendo, N64, Genesis, Dreamcast, Atari 2600, Atari 5200, IntelliVision, and a Playstation 2.
I built Melissa a smaller desk for her laptop and …um… bill paying supplies, a bookcase and side table.
Now our office area looks new modern and fresh…. except for one thing: My Computer.
Sitting on top of all this new modern furniture is a half open PC and a huge beige CRT monitor. I went and bought a new HP, and a 22 inch flat screen monitor, then I moved the old computer into the top of a closet… networked everything together and used it as a file server.
Once I got everything merged to the file server I set up each computer to back up its files via Microsoft Synctoy. Then I set up a Beta account with Utorrent:falcon. This allows me to add and maintain torrents via a website on my laptop or iPhone, or I can use its built in HTTP server to access utorrent remotely while I am on my home network.
all of this came in very handy… in total we had 4tb of network storage.
Once I realized how much of a pain in the ass it is to climb into the closet every time I needed to change something on the server, I realized I needed a remote access tool.
I installed tightVnc. This allows me to log in from any computer or the iPhone and have access to my servers desktop. I can do anything from tightVnc like I would if I were sitting in front of the server.
Since tightVnc is lacking in the security department I updated my router to a wireless N+ with a different type of firmware and a hardware firewall. The firewall allows me to specify certain mac addresses, and only allow those address to connect to the network. That coupled with several other authentication measures makes the network rather secure.

With all this complete I decided it was time to give some attention to my family. I got an iPod Dock for Jason’s iPod… it is setup to sync a library filled with RockaBye Baby tunes as well as some Baby Genius stuff. Then attached a webcam to his crib, allowing my family in Florida to check in on them whenever they want… to save me some time setting up a cam viewer on my site I set up an account with ustream and linked that to a page on my site. The upside to using ustream is that you can record the cam when it is live and save those recordings as shows so that people can watch them when the cam is offline.

After doing all of that I turned my attention to my car.
I replaced a bunch of heather hoses, pcv valve, rerouted some exhaust gas tubing… generally just fixed random things. I finally fixed the door on the truck, the brakes on Melissa’s car, and the Vacuum modulator on the Comet.

All in all I feel like I have gotten a few things done over the last couple of weeks. Its been awhile since I have felt like I have accomplished something.

me= sure… id love to chat
you do know however that ****** warns people about users who have no photos “No picture found. Be suspicious.” :P
also when there is no picture people tend to assume the worst…
i dont however… because it really makes no diffrence to me.

her= You can see pics of me on myspace
www.myspace.com/******
the only pics of me on there are from my wedding and thats why i felt they would be inappropriate for a dating site. my profile is private so you’ll have to send a friend request. i log in everyday so i’ll be sure to approve you.

me= so i have to ask… why is a gorgeous married woman on *****?

her= I left my husband 2 months ago because he’s…alot of things. Made a rash decision to marry him. Biggest mistake of my life. I want to meet someone who can treat me right.

her= I actually live in Lavonia right now. I only lived in Easley while I was with my husband. I am between jobs right now, when I left Easley it made the commute impossible. I hated to give up the damn good money though. I was a sales manager for the biggest Aaron’s store in the entire company. Very demanding. I interviewed last week at a title loan company in toccoa. I should be hearing from them monday.
So you left out the part about the other place you worked..whats up with that? Come on you can tell me. And what do you do for a living now? I take it you travel sometimes.
Anyway I hope I can catch you online sometime so we can chat. i’d like to learn more about you.

me= well… i managed the strip club in lavonia for about a year. after that i worked at dads… then did some webdesign work for a church here in anderson.
now i work as a meter tech for duke energy. i do have to travel sometimes… but not often.
from what i have seen… it looks hard to find good work in lavonia, i hope everything works out for you.
by the way..
my messenger names are
yahoo= *******
aim= ********
feel free to message me anytime :)

her= Hey whats up? I’m about to go to bed just thought I would drop by and tell you good night. Can’t wait to see you Tuesday.
talk to you later.

her=
ok this sucks really bad but I have really tried to go to sleep and its not working. i hope you are resting well. my mom wants me to go look at a house for us tomorrow. the ad sounds pretty good. so i’ll go check it out. i’ll be stuck taking a long ass nap in the morning after i take bailey to daycare. tonight bailey dumped ALOT of water on the floor while she was in the bathtub,, i had to get the steam cleaner out to clean up all the water. Maybe i shouldn’t let her have cups in the bath tub anymore. That was probably the most excting thing that went on around here today. I’ll probably play some more movie trivia things on myspace and head back to bed. my stomach is growling, so I am going to go fix me a sandwich or something. I am really looking forward to you coming to see me tuesday. we’ll find something to do i’m sure. maybe give you the grand tour of lavonia ha ha. i can’t believe i wasnt able to go to sleep, alot on my mind i guess. having trouble shutting my mind off. anyway i hope to talk to you tomorrow night sometime.
melissa

I am finally awake from my nap and its almost 3 in the afternoon. kinda fun to think about what i was doing 12 hours ago. i hope you got enough sleep last night. i also hope you are having a good day at work. All the weeds and the grass in the front yard was magically cut when i woke up a few mintutes ago. I’m confused. I didnt hear the dog barking or a lawn mower, and I KNOW it wasnt like that when i got home this morning. Maybe it was the landscaping fairy. Or I bet my mom hired someone to come do it since our weedeater is messed up. If she would’ve told me someone was coming by I would’ve brought the dog in. Oh well its done now. That was really sweet of you to call and make sure I didn’t get lost. I had a lot of things going through my mind on the drive home. Good things so don’t worry. Well I guess I need to get off my ass and do something. Oh yeah I forgot to tell you this: last night I left Bailey alone in the bath tub, and this time, instead of dumping water out of the tub, she dragged by laundry basket into the water. I walked in there and clolthes were soaking wet and a half empty basket floating in the tub. I luaghed my ass off, but if she had been older, she would’ve been in SOOOOO much trouble. Pretty funny. Well I’m gonna hop off here. I can’t wait to see you again tomorrow night. Let me know when you get home and me and Bailey will come see you…
melissa

and the rest is history.